Much Ado About Nothing?

Hello there, everyone! I suppose that in comparison to my past few posts, there are relatively few concrete events to discuss this time (if it gives you any idea, I am sitting in my living room watching Friends and doing laundry right now). Nevertheless, at the risk of overinflating the importance of certain intangibles I feel that a lot has happened to me recently. Over the past week, I have gone through so many ups and downs that it's difficult to even put them into a coherent scheme, but I believe I'm beginning to digest it all a bit more.

Before I get too far into this, I would like to preface the post with a provisional apology of sorts. I know that I HATE to read about and/or hear people carry on about their feelings incessantly, so I'm hesitant to stray into that self-indulgent territory. However, I also genuinely believe that what I've encountered these past few days is just as much a part of my study abroad experience as the sightseeing I do and the classes I attend.

Perhaps I should explain. When I wrote last week, I touched on the fact that I had felt a bit unexpectedly homesick when I was sorting out my class concerns. Although I was doing better on Wednesday and Thursday, the unease remained and even flared again over the weekend. It was set to be a grand time, with the Arcadia students taking a trip to Belfast to learn more about Northern Irish culture. All this was great...until, of course, on Friday morning I woke up with the stomach flu right before we were supposed to leave. Our program liaison Grainne very kindly bought me a cup of tea to settle my stomach before the bus ride. I got to Belfast without major incident, but for the rest of the trip I didn't see much of the city except for my hostel bed. As you might imagine, this gave me a solid chunk of time to feel sorry for myself and wish that I was back in the United States. What surprised me is that I wanted more than anything to be in California for those few days--not in Washington, the place with which I most strongly identify my concept of "home." Somehow, though, I suppose being ill has a way of making a person want to revert to the most basic level of existence, safe in the care of family and free from adult responsibility.

After I returned to Dublin, my illness--and my bad mood--persisted. Having gone three days without a full night's sleep, I was physically drained and dreading the school week for which I knew I was unprepared. In this frame of mind, I grew increasingly discouraged about my time abroad. It wasn't so much that there was anything wrong with Dublin in my eyes, but I felt a disconnect from my environment. Yes, I had been living here for a little over a month now, but I hadn't gotten the sense of home that I had expected yet. Moreover, I was afraid that this was a personal failing, that maybe I had chosen the wrong place, that I was doing study abroad "wrong;" after all, peers had assured me that study abroad was the best part of their college careers, and my supporters from home had eagerly anticipated me having the time of my life here. I didn't want to disappoint them or myself.

While it would be overly simplistic for me to ascribe my entire negative view to outside circumstances, I have to say that getting my first full night's sleep in a week last night and feeling almost normal health-wise today have done wonders to improve my outlook. Yesterday I promised myself that I would skip my last class without guilt in order to rest, recover, and recenter myself for the remainder of the week. As a result, I found myself at once both more invigorated and more settled and was able to enjoy the end of my week. I attended a great lecture for my Early English Language module this morning, wherein we discussed illuminated manuscripts and Anglo-Saxon poetry. My enthusiasm in lecture revealed that so many avenues have opened themselves for me here, and I am happy and confident in my course of study in a way that I don't think I ever have been. In contrast to the burnout I encountered last spring, I can really see myself attending and enjoying grad school for medieval history when I graduate from Puget Sound.

The real turning point, though, came just this afternoon when I went to pick up a care package at the post office that had come from my Pi Phi sisters back in Tacoma. The candy and well-wishes lifted my spirits considerably, but the part that struck me most was actually just the process of going to retrieve it. Stepping out into the chilly fall breeze and inhaling the homey chimney-smoke smell of the air around me--the moment didn't feel imbued with any special significance; rather, the very ordinariness of it was what I reveled in. It just felt so normal, so natural--routine, even--and that's when I realized that perhaps I feel more at home in Dublin that I had previously acknowledged.

I'm not going to claim that I think Dublin is perfect and that I have no reservations left about my time here. Then again, I'm not ruling out the possibility of me coming back in a couple years, either. At this point, I think that I'm only beginning to understand my own jumble of thoughts and emotions surrounding my semester in Ireland. Chaotic though it may be, the ongoing struggle and delight are authentic, and I feel liberated by the notion that there IS no right way to study abroad. Thus, while the confusion, identity crises, and day-to-day happenings that I divulge may match those of others and may even seem painfully conventional from an outsider's perspective, I can say with certainty that they are aspects of a process than I can claim as being uniquely my own.

Until next time (after a brief jaunt to Brussels and Amsterdam),

 Kelli

Living in Style on the Emerald Isle

In a genuine attempt to be more consistent with updating this blog, here I am again to fill you in on what I've been doing for the past week and a half. Quite frankly, though, this is also a bit self-serving--if I were to wait any longer, I would surely have so much to talk about that I would have to omit discussing some of the great things that have been happening here. Last weekend, I took a trip with some of my friends to Co. Galway. When we had visited it the first time for our homestay, we had all fallen in love with the area, so we decided to make it our home base for a couple of days as we embarked upon a couple of day trips. We arrived on Friday night to Galway City and checked into the Woodquay Hostel, a cute little place with a homey atmosphere. The woman who ran the hostel clearly took a great deal of pride in the area, and she enthusiastically provided us with some background on "the cultural capital of Ireland" and gave us suggestions for different activities to try during the course of our stay. Hearing her talk about how much there was to do, I found myself wishing that we could stay for longer than just a weekend. For a few of us, this realization caused a bit of apprehension and even melancholy as we began to wonder whether we should have chosen a place like Galway to study abroad instead of the larger and more urban environment of Dublin. On some level, Galway has a more specifically and authentically Irish feel; the latter is a distinctly more international city, and we questioned whether we were getting the full experience that we wanted.

You'll be glad to know, then, that the weekend trip actually helped me come to terms with my location and appreciate Dublin. Galway and the surrounding area are wonderful, and I would certainly consider living there one day (perhaps even working at NUIG, in an ideal scenario), but Dublin truly is a good place in which to study this semester. Where I am, I get the best of both worlds: an urban setting with a lively atmosphere, and easy access to smaller towns and more rural areas when I need to get away from the noise and fast pace.

As far as getting away, this weekend's trip was the perfect way to do it. On Friday night, we all went out to a couple of pubs, wanting to sample some of the nightlife for which Galway is notorious among college students. What I found interesting about the whole experience is that, since there are fewer people out on the streets than in Dublin, catcallers and people struggling to walk straight are actually more salient than in the big city where everyone is doing their own thing. As far as the pubs themselves went, my friends and I stopped in to a place called Hole in the Wall and another, larger venue called The Front Door. The Hole in the Wall was fairly quiet, but I enjoyed myself immensely at The Front Door where I had an intelligent (and gloriously platonic) conversation with a local. The next morning, the group of us took a bus over to a ferry that brought us to Inis Mor, the largest of the Aran Islands. Once on the island, we rented bicycles and rode around to explore on our own. Although when we first arrived the weather was freezing cold, a quick stop for lunch gave us an opportunity to warm up before we began our ride. Once we did, I was SO glad that we had decided to brave the weather. As soon as everyone hopped on the bikes there was a marked increase in enthusiasm, and we spent the rest of the afternoon in the throes of what I can only describe as pure whimsy. The combination of the rushing wind, the spectacular ocean views, and the sympathetic laughter as we all struggled to climb the hills together made for a wonderful couple of hours. Once we had finished riding, we went down to the Aran Sweater Shop to search for souvenirs. The Aran Islands are home to the famous Aran sweater, knitted with family-specific weave patterns and originally made for fishermen. Although I'm allergic to wool and couldn't purchase any sweaters, I still had fun exploring the shop briefly before we boarded our return ferry.

We went out on the town again that evening, but since I was feeling tired I decided to call it an early night. The next morning we prepared for our second daytrip, a bus-guided tour of The Burren in Co. Clare and the Cliffs of Moher led by a cheeky little driver whose catchphrase was "Wooooow". To be perfectly honest, my favorite part of the day was the ride itself. The scenery was so lovely--not in the sense of breathtaking landscapes warranting an effusion of superlatives, but in its very simplicity. The sloping hills and rugged limestone lining the bus's path conveyed a humble majesty that lent itself to quiet reflection. Watching it pass by my window I felt an internal stillness--the first genuine sense of peace I've had since I arrived in Ireland. There was one specific photo opportunity stop about which I got pretty excited, though: an earthen ringfort, or rath, in the Burren! Ringforts are round domestic dwellings from the early medieval period in Ireland, and after having discussed them in my archaeology module the previous week it was exciting to see--and stand in--one in person! my friends were a little less enthusiastic about what appeared to them to be a heavily wooded pile of dirt, but once I explained a bit of background I think they appreciated it a little more. Surprisingly, the only real bust of the day was the Cliffs of Moher site. Due to fog in the area, there was a complete whiteout that rendered us incapable of seeing the cliffs at all. Since we had a couple of hours to walk around, we took some pictures and took refuge in the gift shop. I thought the situation was hilarious; my friends, not so much.

Sadly, the beginning of this week was not as enjoyable as the weekend. For the most part, my problems stemmed from academic stress: I found out that one of my modules was not going to transfer for a major requirement back at Puget Sound, and in my other classes I began to panic over the possibility of falling behind. Here, students choose a portion of what they read from a suggested reading list instead of having a set amount of work for each class session: as such, it's been a little difficult for me to gauge whether I have been doing enough. Furthermore, when I emailed a lecturer to ask a question, he emailed back to ask what class I was in. He did it very kindly, but it definitely drove home the fact that I am not in the proverbial Kansas anymore--in Washington, with classes of 25 students, a professor would never need ask which course I was taking.

While these frustrations were minor on an individual level, together they left me a bit discouraged and painfully feeling the distance from my parents as I called them, sobbing, at 3am west coast time. Fortunately, a good night's sleep and the resolution of the class transfer issue did wonders to alleviate my concerns. Additionally, the outpouring of support and happy Youtube videos that I received from my friends to cheer me up was heartwarming, and I am now happy once more. Last night I went to my first Literary Society event, a pub quiz on literary trivia. Our group won a bottle of wine for having the most clever team name ("The Grapes of Rathmines", in honor of the street where we all live), and we fared pretty well in the trivia part, too. Needless to say, we were rock-solid on the Harry Potter round, but we each contributed a bit based on our own literary specialties: Claudio chimed in with a lot of 19th century British literature, Shelby proved the resident expert on all things James Joyce, Kate contributed to questions about plays, and I piped up with my Chaucer knowledge and a couple other tidbits (aka knowing that the children's book Make Way for Ducklings is set in Boston and that the variety of duck discussed therein was a mallard). Tonight, I'm off to a Phil event called the Life Raft Debate, in which the audience pretends there has been a nuclear holocaust and we have to pick one academic to save. Professors from various departments argue why their discipline is the one that warrants salvation, and the audience votes at the end. Tomorrow, I'm then off to Belfast for the weekend with the other Arcadia students. Looking back, I find it laughable that I doubted I was going to get to travel to places besides Dublin while I was here! Listed below is my itinerary for upcoming travel dates and destinations:

14-16 October: Belfast and Giant's Causeway

21-23 October: Brussels and Amsterdam

3-11 November: Wales, Scotland

12 November: Wicklow

17-21 November: England

1-4 December: Switzerland

Well, I believe that's all for now!

Sending you some transatlantic love,

Kelli

Better Late than Never

Well, it's official: I am terrible at keeping this blog updated. I apologise for the delay, but rest assured that the reason I haven't written recently is because I've been so busy doing all the things I'm about to mention!

The last time I posted, I was just finishing up orientation and getting ready to move into my new flat. Since then, I have had an opportunity to settle and get my bearings a bit more. I live with Elise and Amanda, two of the other girls on my program. Elise is a wry-humoured poli sci and psych double major from New Orleans who has gotten all three of us into the habit of saying "y'all," and Amanda is a laid-back English and dance double major from New York. I have been dubbed the "nice but weird" one within the group, but over the past couple of weeks our quirks have all come to surface, so I don't think I'm alone in that. Our apartment itself is great--large and modern with hardwood floors and the comfiest leather couches you can imagine, it's quickly become the most popular place for our friends to hang out (which came in handy when we threw a surprise birthday party for Elise's 21st last week!). Each of us has a single bedroom, but one--affectionately referred to as the "Harry Potter closet"--is a little less than half the size of the others, so we decided to take that room in shifts. I volunteered for the first one, so I get to move on the 15th! I actually don't mind it, really. I still get personal space if I need it, but usually I'm out and about anyway since the 25-minute walk to campus makes multiple trips a day uneconomical. I've added my own little touches, too: the "happy rock" Alana made me to combat homesickness and my signature scented candles top the list of personal effects.

As Elise, Amanda and I have settled in these past couple of weeks and adjusted to the responsibilities of caring for ourselves, I am increasingly grateful that I spent the summer up at Puget Sound this year living off-campus. It forced me to learn things like how to cook and run a dishwasher--skills that are more rare around here than one would think! I've especially enjoyed grocery shopping and cooking for myself. The first week or so I ate out a lot because I had to run so many errands, but now I'm branching out from to things like breakfast burritos, pesto pasta with asparagus and feta, flatbread pizzas, and, as of tonight, couscous stuffed peppers. The other day I realized I missed baking, so I invested in some bakeware and made apple pie muffins. They took a good while to make, but they turned out well! I've also devoted a lot more time to cleaning. My OCD tendencies have emerged, loud and proud, in my mopping and tidying of the apartment. Since my room especially is so small, even two pieces of clothing on the floor can make it look messy.

Despite what all my discussion of domestic activities would indicate, I do spend a lot of time out and about as well. Between moving into our places and the start of classes last Monday, I have been going to pubs and clubs pretty regularly. I would have to say that I prefer the former. Although the vibe differs from place to place, pubs generally have a more casual atmosphere that is conducive to conversation and relaxation, whereas nightclubs have a more markedly hedonistic undercurrent; in fact, some such as Copperface Jacks (a famous nightclub in Dublin referred to as "Coppers") positively ooze excess and sexual tension. While I enjoy social atmospheres, I'm not the biggest fan of being cornered by the men and stepped on by the women. The buddy system helps a lot with this, though, and my friends and I tend to travel in packs when we spend a night on the town. Regardless of where one decides to go, Dublin is a very celebratory city. On September 22, it seemed the entire population of Dublin turned out to commemorate Arthur's Day, the anniversary of the foundation of Guinness stout. My friends and I went to The Bleeding Horse, our favorite pub, and chatted with locals as we listened to live music. I even convinced one to help me snag an Arthur's Day poster as a memento, and I now have it proudly displayed on our flat's refrigerator.

We've all stayed incredibly busy as we attempt to soak up everything we can, but the downside to such full days coupled with late nights is a severely compromised immune system. For quite some time all three of us in the flat were sick, and for those of you familiar with my illness patterns you'll perhaps be amused to hear that my sultry man-voice came out to play for five days or so. We're all doing much better now, though, which is fortunate because the pace of our stay has not let up! Even as I have been getting used to Dublin, I have already had my friends Olivia and Shannen visit me here. Since I hadn't quite established myself by the time Olivia visited, we stuck to more touristy activities such as the Dublin Hop-On, Hop-Off bus tour.We visited the Guinness Factory, Christ Church Cathedral (the filming site for many scenes of The Tudors!), and Kilmainham Gaol. At Christ Church Cathedral we even met a fellow Pi Phi who struck up conversation with me after she saw me wearing my letters! Greek life really does connect you all around the world, it would seem. When Shannen came this past weekend we had more of a low-key visit, walking around Grafton Street (a high-end shopping area filled with boutiques and street performers in the city center) and chatting over Starbucks. 

Before you ask, no, I haven't been going to Starbucks every day here. For the most part I just make instant coffee at home, but Starbucks remains my one true love. I've actually gone there for the past few days to study, now that I've found one that's a little quieter. Besides, there are VERY few places in Dublin that one can get a decent iced blended coffee. High maintenance? Perhaps, but since I've been frugal thus far I think it's something I can continue to enjoy in moderation. 

Although I've dedicated most of my time thus far to describing Dublin, I should not neglect to mention the amazing homestay trip I took the weekend before classes started. The Arcadia students were assigned to host families in Co. Galway for two days, where we got to experience a different microcosm of Irish culture. The trip got off to a wonderful start. The bus ride through the country took us through some beautiful scenery. I watched avidly out of the window as we rode out of Dublin into the Maynooth area, past fall foliage which resembled that in Washington state at this time of year, and even further into idyllic pastoral scenes of sheep grazing on bottle-green grass. Perhaps the most poignant images out my window were those of the medieval towers and castle ruins that we passed, scattered along the roadside. These structures were not marked by ornate plaques or flocks of tourists; rather, they were integrated into the very landscape, an unassuming but inextricable aspect of what the countryside had to offer. As overly sentimental as it sounds, seeing those ruins inspired a visceral reaction of sorts within me: this was the Ireland that I had envisioned, the reason that I crossed the Atlantic for a semester of study.

Once we arrived at our destinations, the rest of the homestay was grand as well. Several of the girls from the program were housed near one another in the small town of Kilconly, so the host moms collaborated to take us on a picnic and a sightseeing adventure. We were able to walk along the cliffs of Galway Bay, which afforded some incredible views. The food wasn't bad, either--the Irish take their eating very seriously, and we were constantly showered with second and third helpings. My host mother, Ann, was a soft-spoken but good-natured woman. Though she has faced several hardships in her life, she has a matter-of-fact and upbeat outlook. She's a highly accomplished woman--in addition to raising cattle, she is a mother of three and has started her own charity! In the morning she took my friend Elizabeth and me on a walk around her area, which provided ample opportunity for picture-taking. Elizabeth is an avid picture-taker, and I too got a chance to reconnect with my love of photography as I explored the bogs and farms nearby. Ann also took us to Saturday night Mass, which was fun to experience even though it caused my first real pang of homesickness in light of some turbulence occurring at my own home church in California at the time.

As lovely as the homestay was, I was nevertheless happy to return to Dublin for the start of classes. The week before had been Freshers' Week, a series of orientation events for new and visiting students. I didn't go to the evening sessions because I was so tired, but I did sign up for several societies at the club fair on the quad (think LogJam on steroids--SO much free stuff!). I joined the Philosophical Society, referred to more commonly as "the Phil." The organization sponsors guests speakers and debates throughout the term, and I look forward to attending the events. I also joined the International Student Society, the Literary Society, the Horse Racing Society (which has much more to do with group outings than anything remotely concerning horses), the Food and Drink Society, and the Fishing Society. I'm excited to get involved with these groups on campus and assimilate more fully into the campus culture. 

With all of this, I haven't even begun to discuss academics yet! Classes, which are called "modules" here, began last Monday. I am taking 5 for the Michaelmas term, TCD's equivalent of fall semester:

1) From Saints to Vikings: The Archaeology of Early Medieval Ireland

2) Ireland and the Wider World, c. 1534-1641

3) Comedy and Carnival in Medieval and Renaissance Literature

4) Banned [Fiction] in Ireland

5) Early English Language (aka Beginning Old English)

As you know, the subject matter of these classes is perfect for me, so I've been enjoying them immensely so far. Old English is admittedly a little intimidating, but when I sat down to read Chaucer for Comedy and Carnival this morning I felt right at home. The lecturers are great, too. The man who teaches Ireland and the Wider World is super animated and has a very self-deprecating sense of humour regarding Ireland, and the woman who leads my Early English Language group is the self-professed "Crazy Biscuit Lady" who brings cookies to class for everyone. It took me a while to finally settle on which classes to take, but I think I've chosen wisely. The students are friendly as well--one guy named Colin invited me to his apartment after class today for a cup of tea and a lively conversation of hipster-bashing, while a girl named Caoimhe from my Archaeology class chatted with me about California before lecture.

I may be off to The Bleeding Horse in a bit, so I should probably head out soon. While the Bleeding Horse is the place I've mentioned multiple times in this post, there are several little hole-in-the-wall places that I have discovered and frequented since my arrival here. Lemon, for example, is an exquisite crepe cafe not two blocks from campus; Wall and Keogh is a joint with every flavor of tea imaginable; various EXCELLENT kebab restaurants punctuate my walk home each day; and the little Italian deli a block away has these amazing black-and-white tartlets filled with white chocolate and Nutella (I'm telling you--SO MUCH FOOD HERE). 

I hope to update again soon, but if last time is any indicator it may be a while. It's been pretty difficult trying to keep in contact with people owing to the eight-hour time difference, but I'm sure I will come to navigate that a bit more easily in the coming weeks as my schedule becomes more regular.

Until next time, I send my love and best wishes!

--Kelli